Day 15- Christmas Eve

Merry Christmas Eve everyone :)

Oyyyyy today was a doosey. Well this is the first holiday EVER that I have not been able to eat anything. Not even snack on the fruit plate for an appetizer. It was utter TORTURE. But I made it through! I feel extremely accomplished for having made it through the day with my head held (somewhat) high. I definitely had my moments today that I just felt like crumbling and breaking down and crying. I was craving food SO badly. Today was definitely the worst day of the 15 days thus far. I decided to opt out of Christmas dinner at my aunt's tomorrow night, so Christmas should be a non-issue (hopefully).

The important thing here is to remember why I'm doing this.

• To break my addictive habbits towards food
• To bring myself peace, joy and abundance in my life
• To lose weight and feel comfortable and healthy in my body

I am definitely making HUGE strides in all of these fields, but I also know that I am not where I need to be yet. These are the reasons why:

• Tonight proved that I am still addicted to food. All I wanted to do was stuff cookies in my mouth all day and I could not get food out of my head
• Today I also realized that I need to work on keeping myself centered and balanced in hard times. It is easy to talk about being present when everything is good- but it's a totally different beast when things are bad.
• I am still not comfortable with my weight. I know that I am not a very healthy weight, but I still feel like I have extra pounds around my belly and I will not be completely comfortable until those are gone. I love myself and my body, and this is not meant to be self-defeating. I just know that I can make my body healthier, and that is what I plan to do.

Today I really doubted whether or not I'd be able to do another 15 days of this. But after I came home and made myself a small cup of pomegranate grapefruit juice I think I reassured myself a bit. I really think that I will reach my goals if I go for another 15 days. I plan on manifesting this with all my heart. :)

Peace and blessings to everyone! Love all of your faces!